Why Does Spiritual Growth Have to be so Darn Mysterious?
If I can claim to know anything at all about the spiritual growth process it is that documenting notable findings and keeping a written journal above all else helps to put things into greater perspective. You find me here today at another cross road, hoping beyond all hope that if I document all of these recent finding in one place possibly my light bulb moment will happen and this dense fog settled around me will lift.
Let me start out by saying I have no clue what is to come in the following blog post and hope that by handing over my intention early on that only that which serves my greater purpose will come through now – that my answers will flow freely from these typing fingertips.
I am on day 10 of 54 so far in this second phase and am reallllllly ready for a break through. I have mentioned before that I have 5 fabulous guides that speak to me through clairvoyance, clairaudience…… all the clairs you can imagine. Last month I even received messages in my physical world, something new and exciting. Meaning I would ask a question and get immediate answers by way of things manifesting in my 3D physical world! So exciting. So my process thus far, starting in October has been to intentionally work with each of these guides during a month or two and really come to know their individual purpose in my life and get to know their energy apart from each other. This is so important for me because I have only thus far worked with them together as a group and have no real clue where one boundary ends and another begins.
Something else I have realized while starting on this monthly journey process is that this phase in my growth is dedicated to come to know myself, my highest self, above all else. I recognize that when someone claims to connect with guides, masters, teachers in another dimensions that they are truly just seeking wisdom from themselves on a higher plane. This is my world view and something I have accepted as truth for me, that is not to say it is truth for all, but something to think about. I believe that the guidance we seek from our guides, angles and other dimensional beings is really just a representation of our own lesson path that we have agreed to become aware of at a certain point. I believe that information is given freely by way of the higher self through a method that is easy for the receiver to know. In my case I do not think I have the wisdom yet to give certain guidance, but do believe that an angel of another dimension could relay that which is most appropriate for me to hear and chose to receive my guidance in such a way. Thus a contract to fulfill my lesson plan is created. Just a part of the whole that I have been working on for some time now.
This month my overall goal is to learn to see more clearly and to heal. These of course are broad set goal, as things have narrowed down and I have come to understand this month’s process more fully I understand that I am to leave my old self behind and move forward into a world that I am no longer attached to. Wow, right. This is the hardest thing I have been asked to do thus far in my spiritual evolution. I remember about a year back listening to a teacher talk about her own process and how she had already created one universe while on earth that is now functioning completely without any effort from her and she is now on her second universe creation. I remember hearing this and trying to visualize or conceptualize exactly what she mean by that. I tried my hardest to no avail. I had no clue what she was trying to say. Little did I know a year later this is exactly what I would be called to do. I know understand the meaning of what she was trying to express and it is the most complicated and trying thing I will do thus far.
I know that up to this point in my life I have created a persona that is Jenessee Roy. This persona has built a life and created stories that have served Jenessee’s best interest and it is time to allow that part of myself to carry on without any more focused attention from my higher self. Jenessee as the person you may or may not know will go on her everyday life just the same growing and cultivating whatever it was she set out to do, but the soul to Jenessee now must move on and detach focus from herself and move into a space that serves ever other universe that has been created within this multidimensional universe we live in. I no longer serve the universe solely created that is Jenessee, but it is time to serve the millions of universes that interact with that singular universe. Does this make sense at all?? So my goal is to detach from what serves Jenessee and move into the light of serving anyone who flows into or out of my life no longer being attached to anyone thing but to everything. This is so much easier said than done. How does one begin such a process…..
I was guided to start with my children. Let’s just say I have not yet achieved selflessness. Having a 3 and 4 year old will for sure drive you crazy on the slowest of days. Try to lose yourself in the face of a 3 and 4 year old and you get me as I am right now, sick for almost a week now and with the fog still settled all around me. Every morning I am faced with the 4 year old who’s emotions are running wild and try to lose myself in the flow of his universe and 5 minutes later I am right back into Jenessee and her needs and her wants. Why is it so hard to lose yourself and your needs completely in life. This is the question I have been asking myself for 10 days straight.
To go with the flow of life, that is my ultimate goal and it sounds so easy. To put this practice into full use is one of the most trying and complicated things I have ever tried to accomplish. I have underestimated selflessness and believe this is why my body resorts to sickness to prove the power of blocks and control. I intend to stay heart centered and clear. With clarity and groundedness we can begin to feel the energy of what surrounds us. Once we feel into the energy of our ever moving and flowing field we can begin to allow emotions to run through us being a bystander to their usually tempting lure. Once we can move through emotional situations with clarity and flow we can then begin to hold light, love, and space for those around us. By giving up the universe of yourself and moving into the multi-universe you chose to become a light for others solely by choosing to hold a frequency that other will be able to feel from miles away from you. Choosing to become a beacon for others takes practice and patience two things I still have still 45 more days to get the hang of.
More coming soon!