I see the light. My first journey, the spiritual emergency, had come to a close by twenty-three years of age. I stopped blaming my physical manifestations of headaches, insomnia, and bulimia on myself and other people and truly dealt with the root cause of what was screaming so loudly for my attention. I recently found out that the term spiritual emergency is an actual term meaning: a form of identity crisis where an individual experiences drastic changes to their meaning (i.e. their unique purposes, goals, values, attitude and beliefs, identity, and focus) typically because of a spontaneous spiritual experience.
Having never studied psychology, this term was completely new to me when I read it from a book one day. It resonated so deeply with me that I started using the term it could define what I was going through. I began using the words to describe my own process to people and found I could use these words to identify so many things in so many peoples’ lives. I haven’t looked much into how a psychologist might use this to classify someone on a case-by-case basis and don’t claim to understand the true meaning as it is defined in any modern psychology journal but would feel confident in using it to describe my own experience any day of the week. Through my journey, I came to believe the spiritual emergency was a way to unblock my spirit or my true self. There were authentic lessons and spiritual concepts that I had learned and understood very well prior to the emergency, but found it was near impossible for me to practice these knowing until the emergency took place. I later realized that my true self had to be released and my lower self had to be acknowledged before I would be allowed to move into spiritual practices that would not have benefitted me without the recognition of who I truly was. My authentic self was so buried under falsified personas and misleading concepts that for full physical transformation, in order to unlock all of the beauty that lay within, I had to go through my own unique hell.
If you're thinking that it seems like hard work to go through a spiritual emergency, you would be right! I found out shortly after this first transformational process ended that I could sit pretty enjoying my developments up to that point and relax into the understanding of my own consciousness, no longer being a slave to the patterning or conditions I had placed on myself.
I recognized with this newfound understanding of my consciousness that I could enjoy life more fully and enjoy all the unique attributes of myself and the people around me. I could stop here and let life happen as it may, choosing to partake in its glory until the end of my days. Sounds nice, right?
Well, the one thing about a spiritual process is that once you taste the nectar you don’t settle for just physical command over your personal journey. Like others, before me, I recognized a need to connect deeply to the seen and unseen aspects of life around me, and that is what led me to embark upon journey number two.
The hardest part about living through a spiritual transformation like this is that people find when they come to see the light others around them are still in the dark. This becomes a tough situation for many people to handle, and could lead to leaving friends behind who no longer support the new you, or a move across the country, or a big career change, or something that completely detaches you from your former shadowed self. Think of the emergency as a way to shed your old skin and change into that shining light you were designed to be. Not all emergencies need to end in sudden change, but typically when we go through this form of change our spirit craves more to help us grow and learn from a higher plane of existence, and therefore change is bound to take place.
LEVEL 2 did not start until yet another MID-LIFE CRISIS took place to pull me back into self-actualization.